I awoke to this thought, something very simple, but something I often overlook:
- Sometimes something appears to happen TO me.
- That same something sometimes appears to happen OUTSIDE of me.
- That same something sometimes appears to happen INSIDE of me.
#1 feels personal. It happens when I’m caught in the illusion of me. It often causes emotional pain.
#2 and #3 happen when I’m not lost. They are impersonal. They happen from the Witness perspective (#2) or from the boundary-less Emptiness state (#3). Often they happen at the same time.
When I feel #1, when I feel something is happening to me, I want to remember this. I want to use it as a reminder that the “me” is an illusion—that I’m taking the me-thing too seriously.
It seems that my practice now is similar to what I teach about living as a Soul, but from the other side of awakening. I’m not sure of the difference yet. It feels different—but I’m not sure exactly what the difference is. Maybe it has something to do with knowing I’m eternal (post-awakening) rather than the pre-awakening practice of convincing myself of it through research and playing with it?
It’s similar to the way Radiance feels different between pre- and post-awakening. Pre-awakening Radiance feels like you are the portal (the ego contraction) and the Light is other. Post-awakening Radiance feels like you are the Light and the portal/ego is other.
Hmm. I was just proof-reading the above. Post-awakened Soul (eternal) + post awakened Radiance (Love/Light) + Emptiness (Self minus me) = The eternal impersonal Love/Light.
It’s not No-Thing as most of today’s nondualists/nihilists would suggest. It’s No-Self.
To live as the eternal impersonal Love/Light.
That clarifies things. That’s my practice. I need to remember this.
Theories are wonderful and easy. Application, not so much.
After driving for a bit, I made camp at a boat ramp outside Port St. Joe. I don’t think you’re officially allowed to camp here, but boat ramps are places where vehicles are left unattended all the time (while their owners are out boating), so they make good stealth camping spots as long as your rig looks like it could carry a canoe or kayak on it (ie: a roof rack). Regardless, I’ve never been bothered at one. Hell, I’ve never even seen any BRPPs (boat ramp parking police).
On the live as the eternal impersonal Love/Light: I don’t want readers to think that I intend to try to act this way. No. What I mean is that when you remove the me-me-me-thing as completely as possible, the eternal impersonal Love/Light is what is left. My practice is to self-monitor (when I remember) and when not feeling the Love/Light, to see what mistaken assumption (the me-thing) is blocking it.
I sometimes get comments and emails from readers who say, “We’re already enlightened|awake|no-self|… so there’s nothing you need to do.” I don’t agree with this. This misunderstanding is quite common, so much so that Ken Wilbur came up with a term for it, the Pre/Trans Fallacy. Thinking you’re already enlightened doesn’t mean you experience the enlightened no-boundaries state. For example, an infant may experience “oceanic” oneness but this isn’t the same as unity consciousness since the infant doesn’t know how oneness is different from separation since it hasn’t experience separation yet.
My point is that just because the eternal impersonal Love/Light is really what we all are, it doesn’t mean that this is the way we experience life. We can’t experience ourselves as the eternal impersonal Love/Light when the ego/identity blocks the view.
The mystery truck just drove by my rig, circled the lot and drove off. Right on time too.